3P Random Reflections Blog

Today I was reflecting on the fears that tend to arise every time I hear of a law or regulation that appears to victimize the powerless, whether people (me included) or nature. I'm guessing that this is something that everyone experiences. The only differences being in each of our specific beliefs about which laws do what types of harm.


I have no comprehension of all the incredibly complex ways in which any law gets applied and enforced, but I am keenly aware that any law can always be used by the insecure and powerful for their own gain (keeping in mind that any human being can be insecure, and any human being can be more powerful than others in various circumstances).


When it comes to laws, including our current (often politically and fearfully driven) discourse about what laws we should have or shouldn't have, perhaps there's another possible direction to look in first.


What if I believed that humanity was essentially evil, as in survival of the fittest?


What if I believed that I was essentially alone and vulnerable in this world... a singular, insecure being, separate from everyone else and everything else?


Then I would find things to fear, and I would want the organization of society (and laws) to be set up in such a way to mitigate or control whatever are the biggest concerns being created in my personal mind... a list of concerns, that I may NOT notice, keeps getting added to, no matter how many of my previous concerns get "solved".


The fact that I believe there is something "out there" to fear, means that I will ALWAYS find it.




What if I believed that humanity was essentially good?


What if I believed that I was intrinsically connected to everyone and everything, in ways that I cannot even begin to comprehend?


Then I would find things to love, and I would trust and BE in life with a much bigger (and less personally protective) understanding. I would approach concerns with a bit more grace and wisdom, expecting good first, while also knowing that I can intuitively navigate whatever shows up... whether I'm presented with the manifestation of someone else's fear or someone else's love.


The fact that I truly believe there is something "out there" to love, means that I will ALWAYS find it, even in circumstances that would otherwise appear to be bereft of it.


Our challenge in society is not the laws we have or don't have. It's simply the belief in fear.


In regard to fear, I don't think that most people follow laws most of the time because of their fear of the potential consequences. They follow them simply because they make sense or they (as human beings) are essentially good and cooperative and usually do not wish to do harm to others.


But, as long as any human being believes their feelings of insecurity (fear), they will, in those moments, do what occurs to them to protect themselves, including ignoring or circumventing laws that get in their way, or if powerful enough, writing laws that let them get their way. Some have made a habit of it.


Now, in regard to finding love, I don't exist in a world of form filled with rainbows and unicorns. And so I don't tend to walk down dark alleys, or leave my doors unlocked. I also haven't stopped the desire to champion (fight) against unjust laws and societal norms that appear to overwhelmingly victimize the powerless.


However, I am aware that it's only "hurt people that hurt people", it's only moments of believed insecurity that foster insecure behaviour, it's only fear that is at the root of all the actions that laws are designed to mitigate or protect.


I also have a strong sense that it can be incredibly transformative (for myself and others) when I consider love first, instead of fear.


I can't make anyone look in this direction, any more than I can make someone obey a law. But I can look in the direction of love myself, and somehow continue to do so, even though I naturally keep falling back into my own brand of insecure thought daily (what I lovingly refer to as my own personal craziness).


And in a way, that's everything. I somehow keep learning to look toward love first, while navigating all the rest in whatever way it occurs to me to do so. No law required.

In my work as a corporate trainer, I remember a training session led by one of my mentors, pointing us to the innate human ability to take seemingly isolated objects and connect them together. He randomly pointed to three things... a ceiling tile in the room we were in, the chair we were sitting on, and a crow flitting around under the patio tables and chairs just outside the window.


He then gave us some time to come up with a list of connections between those three things. He asked us to think of anything and everything, no matter how crazy, for how the three objects could be linked.


After the assigned time for the exercise was over, everyone shared what they came up with. A few of the ideas were similar, but none were exactly the same. Here's some of them...


  • All 3 objects are within 50 feet of me
  • All 3 objects make me uncomfortable... this chair is uncomfortable, I hate fixing ceiling tiles, and I'm a bit afraid of birds
  • All 3 are on the property of the hotel
  • All 3 are made up of vibrating atoms
  • All 3 have the colour black somewhere on them
  • All 3 likely have dust on them
  • All 3 reflect industrialization... the products created (chair, ceiling tile) and the effects manifested (birds having to learn to survive in an urban landscape)
  • If I heard something making a rustling sound in my ceiling, I could stand on the chair, lift up the ceiling tile, and discover it was a trapped crow flitting around
  • All 3 start with the letter C (chair, ceiling tile crow)
  • Each represents a part of life (ceiling tile is heaven, chair is earth, the crow that can live on earth and in the sky is the symbol that heaven and earth are one)


What are some more you can come up with?


To be honest, I had to make up that list because I couldn't remember all 3 objects given to us nor any of the answers created, but you get the idea.


If any of us comes up with something to believe in (such as a fact that two or more specific objects are intrinsically linked), our minds can easily find evidence to prove it. With access to the infinitely creative power of thought, any list could be added to and reinforced forever.


What's significant to me, are the ramifications of having a list already started in my head, that somehow appeared, with no conscious effort on my part...

...perhaps at some point in my life, I started a list that connects "(insert name here) politician" and "dangerous"
...perhaps at some point in my life, I started a list that connects "oil pipeline" and "bad idea"
...perhaps at some point in my life, I started a list that connects "climate change" and "exaggeration"
...perhaps at some point in my life, I started a list that connects "peanut butter" and "incredibly delicious".


What's interesting is that once a list is started (a belief is set), then it becomes a door through which I interact with the world. I open the door for whatever adds to the list, and I barricade the door against whatever contradicts it.


Having lists is very useful in this world of form. It helps me decide which politician to vote for, and what to make for my lunch.


What's not very useful is retaining any specific list for any extended period of time, assuming it will ALWAYS be right, despite the continually changing nature of life and potential for new thought. It stops me from questioning the politician I like, or considering a good idea from the politician I don't like. It stops me from discovering the world of culinary abundance that exists beyond my holy peanut butter sandwich, or being willing to even consider that it's the sandwich carbs that are making me sleepy in the afternoon.


I assume that I can (and will) live my entire life with some lists, but it's such a relief every time I discover the next list I didn't even realize I had. Once exposed to the light of awareness, the linked items that started the list either magically change or get completely deleted, so that I can take down some of the barricades I was using to protect it, and me. They're awfully exhausting to keep holding up.

I saw a video a couple of years ago with a person named Basil Braveheart who talked about the difference between the English language and the Lakota language.


What I "heard" (for myself) was a deeper realization of how many Western languages have developed mostly from a very linear understanding of life (time, space, matter)... where everything is measured and timed and labelled and separated.


This is versus the Lakota language (and I'm assuming most other inherently "older" Indigenous languages) that were developed with (and still retain) a spiritual understanding of life... the intrinsic connection of everything and everyone... the divine... the inseparable form and formless nature of life... so that not only the words, but even the sounds and visuals and movements of their language sort of vibrate to awaken individuals to their intrinsic connection to each other and to all of life (the truths of life that can't be explained, but can be experienced).


I think of that sometimes when I come across many English expressions like "you've got balls" or even words as simple as "right" and "wrong" or "us and them", that are prolific within the English language, and that inevitably label and separate and differentiate us.


How different would the words and sounds and expressions of Western languages be if we lived with more awareness of the spiritual nature of life that some people have not yet lost, that some other people have somehow intuited, and that all of us know at some level?


If you're interested in the 40-minute Basil Braveheart "Walking in Two Worlds" video, the link is here... https://vimeo.com/203518720

My husband and I often go for walks around the neighbourhood. Sometimes we chat a lot, sometimes not so much, but often we notice the animals and quirky little "neighbourhood treasures" that come into view, like rabbits and squirrels, or arson-melted garbage cans and gnome gardens. We say hello to the dogs that bark at us and stop to pet the occasional cat that welcomes us (OK, it's just me that pets the cats, or at least tries to, LOL).


One day we were rounding a corner into an alley, and while I continued walking ahead, I eventually noticed that my husband had started walking in slow motion. It took a few moments to realize what he was up to, but then I spied the "Slow Down, Kids Playing" sign, and realized he was taking it literally, and was amusingly waiting to see if and when I caught on. He likes to do stuff like that a lot. I often appear to be his personal source of patient amusement.


On that day, the precedent (the game) was silently and knowingly set.


Every time we took the same route, and rounded the corner into the alley, we knew to slow down.


But, being aware of the game, and remembering to play the game are two entirely different things.


Quite often, both of us would slow down upon turning the corner, but probably just as many times, one of us did not. And then it would be to the delicious amusement of the one slowing down, to see how long it took for the other one to eventually catch on. Upon realization, the ensuing groan of acknowledgement then represented the invisible "trophy of glory" to be humbly accepted by the "winner", and perhaps accompanied by a nod, a smile, or just a satisfying internal glow.


Overall, my husband has probably "won" more often than me, but recently, I was on a bit of a streak. It had been at least 3 times in a row where I had remembered and my husband had forgotten. Until the other day, that is.


We happened to be engrossed in a conversation about someone else's behaviour... why they were wrong and why we were right, and how, oh yah, we know there's really no right or wrong, and that we're the ones creating the experience, and that we're just trying to fix them so we can feel better, and that they're actually our greatest teacher, but... we're still more right and they're still more wrong... you know how that goes... or maybe you don't... perhaps that's just our personal crazy?


Anyhoo... as we rounded the corner into the alley, my husband remembered the sign and I didn't.


And as soon as I caught on, we both laughed out loud. I was amusingly crushed upon the realization of how I had been caught unaware, how I had spoiled my "monumental" streak, and how I was now handing over the invisible trophy. I had innocently and unknowingly been consumed by our conversation and not present to our current surroundings. I forgot the game!


My husband was obviously feeling very pleased that fortune had turned in his favour, and after laughing out loud along with me, he pointed out how both of us had pretty well completely missed most of our environment, right from the beginning of the walk when our conversation about the "offending person" began... no bunnies, no squirrels, no dogs, and no quirky neighbourhood treasures, even though they were certainly appearing all around us.


But in that moment of awareness, our spell was broken...


And not only the "spell of non-attention to the present moment and environment", but also the "spell of seriousness" we had created around a person and a story that could equally be seen with much hilariousness and lightheartedness. Upon realization, the feeling of seriousness had disappeared and the love had flooded in.


In the end, it doesn't at all matter that we got consumed by seriousness, or even (for me and my ego) that my husband came out of the spell sooner. We've done it many times before and we'll do it again. But how fortunate we both are to understand that the "Slow Down" game is no different than the game of life. Sometimes we are present to what's really going on in the moment, and sometimes we are consumed by our made up stories, and all of that is part of the joy and fun of getting to play at all.


I'd like to say I've learned a lesson here, and that I'm going to be a little bit more prepared for that corner on our next walk, but honestly, I never even know what I'm going to be thinking about 5 seconds from now, so what are the chances I'm NOT going to be lost in another story? Ooooooh, the anticipation!

I am often fascinated by my puny little understanding of this expansive and infinite world of form we experience...


...this incredibly convincing illusion of separation and the intrinsic needs that appear to arise out of it...


...the need to PROTECT ourselves because we appear separate, and yet the need to CONNECT, perhaps because we already sense we are one...


...and hence, our continual ebb and flow...

between insecurity and security,
between addiction and acceptance,
between distraction and presence,
between close-mindedness and curiosity,
between anger and appreciation,
between hopelessness and gratitude,
between desperation and peace,
between greed and generosity,
between sadness and humour,
between confusion and understanding,
between need and contentment,
between fear and love.


My personal preference is that ALL would lean more toward love and away from fear, and yet at the same time, I "know" there's wisdom and love already in it all.


Such a mysterious and rich paradox to discover, and navigate, and wonder about... don't you think?

Latest comments

19.11 | 09:39

Thank you Helen. And thank you for asking. Since this web tool's comment section is limited, I will send you an email with some suggestions.

19.11 | 05:02

great site - thanks. Can you give resource re 3Ps and dealing with shame issues from childhood. how does 3P talk about deep unconscious patterns?

05.11 | 21:18

Was just thinking of you... yes, let's catch up soon! ❤️😊

04.11 | 22:30

Thank you once again Jonelle for your wise words. Let’s talk soon