3P Random Reflections Blog

Do I Want to Play, or Do I Want to Struggle?

When I came across the Principles, my initial insight was “Holy crap, every single thought I’ve ever had in my entire life was completely made up”. It was an incredible relief to discover that all the insecure thinking was made up, but just as interesting for me to see that all the secure thinking was completely made up as well… I’m living in a 24/7 illusion, mostly believing my made up thoughts in every moment, whether good or bad. And so there’s no real “truth” to be found in my thinking, there’s only an “experience” to be found.

And so just because I “KNOW” this, doesn’t stop the universe from providing me with my daily ration of crazy made-up thinking. Sometimes I’m hip to it, and most of the time, I’m genuinely not. I get just as caught up in the mundane… the made up fact that my cup of tea tastes good, or that I’ll put on my black jeans today, or that it’s time to brush my teeth, as I get caught up in the negative… that my neighbours’ kids are hellions as they keep tossing garbage into our yard, or that the pain in my side is never going to go away, or how awful it is that I’m feeling down AGAIN!

After three years with this understanding, I continue to see evidence of how I’m not responsible for creating my thinking, and even more how I’m not responsible for managing it. And even though I have at some level, realized that my thinking system works incredibly well, all on its own, I still can’t seem to stop offering my frequent, pesky, and intrusive moments of interference, in an effort to “be better and feel better”.

The only truth, if any, is that I’m here, having my own completely infinitely unique experience. And so is everyone else. And the less I’m concerned about the good or the bad, the more it seems like a game to be played, and less of a struggle to be overcome.

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Marty Lipsky | Reply 07.04.2016 13:13

Where is your comments about free will? My experience tells me we are all looking for our essence which is complete nothingness. The center of insight.

Jonelle 07.04.2016 18:22

Part 4) My email is procrastinationpublications@shaw.ca

Jonelle 07.04.2016 18:21

Part 3) This website only offers a small comments box, but if you'd like to send me an email, I'd love to hear more about your perspective...

Jonelle 07.04.2016 18:19

Part 2) Maybe I'll write a blog about free will... In the meantime, I'm curious about the connection you see between free will and looking for our essence

Jonelle 07.04.2016 18:16

Hey Marty, Thanks for the question. Free will is still "sticky" for me. I know I'm "doing things" but what and how much of it is consciously guided is a mystery

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Latest comments

05.09 | 16:09

Lovely to hear from you Sharon! And thank you for the question. This website has limited space for comments, so I hopefully it's OK to send you an email. 😊

05.09 | 05:52

Hi Jonelle, just started reading this site-thank you so much. I have a question I hope you can answer for me: are emotions & feelings the same thing?

07.08 | 12:02

How beautiful. Your friend is so lucky to have you. ❤️

07.08 | 12:00

Thank you Andie! Would be lovely to catch up! ❤️

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