As is sometimes prone to happen, I’ve been contemplating the truth of impersonal, unconditional love, while slowly coming out of the grips of an insidious
“making-me-want-to-just-die-and-get-it-over-with” flu virus that has been renewing my acquaintance with physical suffering, apparently for the benefit of the universe.
I know, you’re thinking what I’m thinking, the universe is clearly selfish. LOL!
Anyway, I would personally prefer it, if the universe wasn’t
so interested in my painful feelings, but I’ve been told that I am it’s only “learning tool”.
Damn you, Universal Consciousness (which apparently is the same thing as saying damn me, but, you know, whatever).
At the same time, I have to admit that death isn’t really a concern for me anymore, and my painful
feelings don’t have as much significance as they used to, but I’m still an apparent work in progress (albeit an often amused and glorious one).
So anyway, here’s what I came up with…
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AS THE ESSENCE OF LIFE… LOOK THERE
We sometimes use the words "unconditional love", but most of us don't really understand what true unconditional
love really is. I didn't. I had no inkling until I got a glimpse of it a few years ago.
Whether we realize it or not, most, if not all the love we experience comes with reference or connection to something or someone, and comes with an ENDLESS number of conditions...
We want them near us
We don't want them to suffer
them to be happy
We compare them to others and to ourselves
We see behaviours or traits of theirs that we think could be different or better in some ways
We admire them for some reasons and we have concerns about them for other reasons
We feel pride in their achievements
We feel pain in their losses
We care how they feel about us
We worry how they're doing
We feel loss in their absence
We can't imagine the pain of living without them
We feel the love
for them, and sometimes we don't feel it.
Whether we realize it or not, most, if not all the love we experience is perceived as personal... everything in the relationship is in some way a reflection of the personal "me".
Everything is seen and experienced and felt through our personal filter of feelings, observations, opinions,
judgments, needs, securities, and insecurities.
We project our illusory sense of who we think we are onto every mutually related experience, memory of the past, and imagination of the future.
True unconditional love, the kind of love that "IS the energy of Life", comes without any conditions, without personal relationship, without comparison, without
judgment, without need, without effort, without consideration of time or space.
True unconditional love comes simply and beautifully with pure unconditional acceptance for everyone and everything exactly as it is.
It is a feeling of love much greater, much lighter, and much freer than any personal attachments of love that we create or
There are NO concepts of
right or wrong or good or bad.
is no love OF anyone or anything or even everything.
There is simply the realization of the essence of all life... the realization of being... the realization of the FEELING of love that is free, open, expansive, all encompassing, infinite, and eternal, of everything and of no single one or
no single thing.
Not you. Not me.
And yet, you AND me.
We live mostly
with the awareness of our experiences of personal and conditional love, and perhaps small glimpses of the impersonal and unconditional.
But, it's those glimpses that are the very stuff of life that all of us unknowingly seek, and yet paradoxically and amusingly, all of us already are, even if we
never somehow come to the grace of realizing it.
And for those of us who may be searching, and for those of us who frequently forget, and for those like me who appear to live 99.999% of our time in the non-feeling of it, we can simply hold ourselves gently in any brief moment of any feeling of love
(or really any feeling at all) that wells up within us... the brief moment before we attach that love or that feeling to someone or something... the space both full (and yet empty) of feeling, and free of the conditions of any single thought...
We can always look there.