3P Random Reflections Blog

The Need to Be Seen
We were out for a walk to pick up a package at a neighbour's condo, as part of an abundantly thriving Buy Nothing group in our neighbourhood. When we got to the address, it was a ground floor unit with a large floor-to-ceiling window next to the door.
 
As we got closer we caught sight of a cat contentedly gazing out the window, not looking at anything in particular.
 
Next to the cat was a somewhat sad looking plant, although after a moment it occurred to me that the plant was for the cat... a bouquet of grass... a little bit of the outdoors for an indoor kitty.
 
As we walked up, I noticed that the cat didn't seem to be concerned with our arrival, not even looking our way. "Very cat-like", I giggled in my mind.
 
I bent down in front of the window, about four feet away, and made a little noise and movement to catch the kitty's attention for a photo... but there was no turn of the head, and no response. It's as if I wasn't there at all. "That's weird", I thought.
 
Next, it occurred to me to tap on the window, but the idea of that action reminded me of all the thoughtless and needy zoo visitors or trail walkers, constantly demanding the attention of the animals (including me, LOL!).
 
Wisdom said to me, "Let the kitty be, just as the kitty wishes to be, just appreciate him/her being beautifully undisturbed".
 
I took the photo, just as the kitty was.
 
And then I giggled internally again... this time with awareness of a feeling that had arisen, that to me was uncomfortable, but then immediately funny.
 
The discomfort came as a brief flash of my inability to control a situation, which was accompanied by a little sense of...
 
"Why doesn't this cat want to look at ME?"
 
The "funny" then came in the form of laughing internally at the ridiculousness of my relentless ego, feeling rejected by a cat, who's very job in life is to feign aloofness. LOL!
 
This "need to be seen" (need for acknowledgement, need for acceptance, need to have a voice, need for control), and all the havoc it creates, has been on my mind lately.
 
If my ego can feel rejected by a stranger's cat, and almost get me to tap madly and thoughtlessly on the glass, imagine what incredibly powerful feelings and actions any ego can create when it has moments of feeling rejected by any of the abundant, insecure actions of today's society...
 
And whether that rejection is felt (or enacted) on the basis of colour, or looks, or gender, or race, or age, or religion, or political party, or belief, or economic status, or position, or behaviour, or for anything else... behind it all is the need to be deeply seen and accepted... beyond all the separating, limiting labels.
 
Sometimes, those little twitches of my own ego remind me of the incomprehensible power of thoughts and feelings, and they remind me that whenever anyone's ego (including mine), is found to be madly tapping at the window, I can hold a space of love and understanding, so that there's the potential for feeling truly seen... and then perhaps a little moment of recognition and laughter.
 
With Love and Laughter,
Jonelle

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Latest comments

01.10 | 14:31

I am so glad to hear Sara! So kind of you to let me know! On the website menu to the left is also a "Procrastination" page which has some insights on the topic.

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30.09 | 17:08

I found your blog post after googling "procrastination and the three principles". I'm new to this understanding and your very clear explanation helped. ☺️

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12.12 | 22:29

Thank you Lars! So happy to hear from you, and glad you enjoyed the reading! I hope to continue writing and sharing whenever inspired. 😊

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12.12 | 14:30

Hi Jonelle
Just stumbled across your website, love reading all your insights.
Hope you keep sharing. Thanks from Lars (all the way from Denmark

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